Zorba the Hutt (zorbathut) wrote,
Zorba the Hutt
zorbathut

life, life, life, life, and life

. . . continues. unchanged unchanging.

well, a little changed, always changing, friendships wax and wane and mutual hesitation gives way and so forth.

I find myself a bit frustrated . . . six days left . . . it's been two weeks and I haven't spent more than three hours with her. With any luck we'll spend time tomorrow, but, well . . . the last time she said she'd spend time with me, it stretched until long past midnight, then finally we got a few hours together. which isn't what I was hoping for, I was hoping to actually get to know her better. And I'd be talking to her directly, but whenever I try she's doing five things and talking with her friends and what am I going to do, drag her out in the middle and say "pay attention to me instead?" which is ironic because a lot of those same friends are going to read this, but I'm a hypocrite or something. (maybe I would tell this to her directly . . . but I don't even know where she is now.)

and this whole spending-time-with-me thing, that's the part that hurts, because I've done this once. I've done this twice. And those two times it completely failed and I ended up shattered. is this going to be the third?

I hope not . . . or I would . . . but I'm still not hoping.

blah. I would consider posting this so that she and friends couldn't see it, or something, but that would be dishonest in some ways and she asked me to tell her and I know she'll see this and, well . . . yeah.

just can't think right at the moment, it seems.
Subscribe
  • Post a new comment

    Error

    default userpic

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.
  • 0 comments