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Thursday, April 12th, 2001
2:51a - it's always the small things . . .
. . . that get me in unexpected ways.

This time it was the music played during the end movie of Final Fantasy 7. My standard random playlist (i.e. all the stuff on my hard drive that I've listened to already - nearly 3000 tracks at this point, and probably well over a week of audio) picked it up randomly.

Flashback: sitting in my room with my ex, reminiscing about FF7 by browsing all the full-motion-videos in it. Weapon Attack, for one - great sequence . . .

and the ending, of course.

That was just a day or two before I left for here for the first time . . . now that I look back on it, that was the last great time I had with her.

no. there was one other.

Just before the last - not last. final.

Just before the final bad time.

At least it's playing something different now.


current mood: depressed

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5:07a
    One of the most important determinants of attraction and liking is sheer proximity. By now, dozens of studies have shown that if you want to predict who will make friends with whom, the first thing to ask is who is nearby. Students who live next to each other in a dormitory or sit next to each other in classes develop stronger relations than those who live or sit only a bit farther away. Similarly, members of a bomber crew become much friendlier toward fellow crew members who work right next to them than toward others only a few feet away (Berschied and Walster, 1978; Berscheid, 1985).
    What holds for friendship also holds for mate selection. The statistics are rather impressive. For example, of all the couples who took out marriage licenses in Columbus, Ohio, during the summer of 1949, more than half were people who lived within sixteen blocks of each other when they went out on their first date (Clarke, 1952). Much the same holds for the probability that an engagement will ultimately lead to marriage; the farther apart the two live, the greater the chance that the engagement will br broken off (Bersheid and Walster, 1978). (Basic Psychology, Gleitman, Fridlund, and Reisberg, p.414)
It's so nice to know that my life at least doesn't break any psychological rules . . .

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5:17a
    So far we are only beginning to discover just what it is that constitutes physical attractiveness in our own culture. According to one study, American college men judge photographs of women (whether white, black, or Asian) as more attractive if their faces have certain features that tend to be found in children, such as relatively large, round, and widely separated eyes, a short nose, and a small chin. (Basic Psychology, Gleitman, Fridlund, and Reisberg, p.418)
*falls over laughing* anime girls aren't attractive? I've got psychology to back me up on *this* one :)


current mood: amused

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5:22a
    Surprisingly, men tend to fall in love more often and more quickly than women do, and women tend to fall out of love more easily than men do (Hill, Rubin, and Peplau, 1978). (Basic Psychology, Gleitman, Fridlund, and Reisberg, p.419)
well that explains a lot.

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5:26a
there's too much stuff in here to keep quoting :P I think I'll stop now.

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5:26a
at least I'm finally getting to an interesting part of psych, neh?

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8:20a
There's a Simon and Garfunkel CD I've got - Greatest Hits. Most of it is pretty active and fast. But near the end of the CD, right after "If I Could", there's this little quiet piece called "Bookends" . . .
Time it was, and what a time it was, it was.
A time of innocence.
A time of confidences.
Long ago, it must be
I have a photograph.
Preserve your memories
they're all that's left you.
And then it goes straight into "Cecilia".

A while back, I realized I didn't empathize with "I Am A Rock" anymore - now I seem to empathize with this.

I do have a photograph . . . it's in my backpack. Of just before I left, the first time.

She's smiling in it. Laughing.

I haven't talked to her since I went back for last vacation and failed to meet up with her. I do want to talk to her . . . I know that. But I don't know what I'd talk about. And I do know that part of me wants to yell at her. I'm just not sure if those two parts are the same part or not.

On the Simon and Garfunkel CD, it goes into Cecilia for the last track on the CD. This random playlist of mine, amusingly enough, goes into an Offspring song titled "She's Got Issues".

Ugh, I seem to have post-spammed all the people who've got me on their lists :/ sorry, all. It's just been a very philosophical night, with nobody around to chat with (not that I'm complaining, really, I just had to write this somewhere.) Last post for the night. Probably.

one to go . . . I'm considering vowing to myself that I'll ask before the end of the month. But that's a major thing - I might have to break it, and I try to never vow things that I might break. So far, I'm leaving it at "I'll do my best".

1300 lines of code on Timespace so far. Lots to go.

Now, I believe I shall stop writing.

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