I just realized that this person I've been wanting to ask out . . . probably wouldn't work after all. Because, when all's said and done . . . she's not a tech. She can't follow the stuff I do to any extent, and likely has little to no interest in it anyway. I mean . . . I could fall in love with her, and even assuming she could fall in love with me, maybe we could be happy together for a bit. But . . . I'd always wish she could understand what I do better. And that's no good way to have a relationship.
(flashback: showing my ex that wonderful chain of "logic" that leads to the utterly disgusting syntax of 1[a], that they actually followed and legalized . . . and she got it, halfway through, and laughed . . . and I loved her so much. It's not fair.)
(Then again, if there's one thing the world has taught me . . . it never is.)
Three days from now, I'll be in Seattle, going to an anime convention I was looking forward to for a year, until maybe last week. I don't know why I'm not looking forward to it anymore . . . I'll still go, of course, and I'll enjoy it once I get there of course. But now . . . it just doesn't seem worth it.
